I made an impulse buy of a $30 Elvis suit 3 weeks before leaving Australia in Jan 2008 to travel for a year.
It's crap....and now it's coming with me.
I don't sound like Elvis, look like Elvis, or sing like Elvis.
I am Crap Elvis.


World trip montage - Crap Elvis in 25 countries

Saturday, February 16, 2008

Crap Elvis in Brazil - we partied, we got pickpocketed, we were popcorn...

(and I found Osama)

Well, still no decent net connection so will probably have to wait til I get to Rio to upload the videos from Paraguay and Brazil, but thought I should at least let you know what's been going on lately.

Salvador carnaval was MENTAL! 6 days of huge processions of massive trucks filled with bands and headblowingly loud soundsystems that the army would be proud to use as a weapon, and thousands of people following them dancing from around 2pm til 5am each day. If you wanted to officially follow one of these "blocos" you could pay up to a few hundred dollars to be inside the roped area which extends a couple of hundred metres before and after the truck. But 3cms on the other side of the rope, you could forego luxuries like security and safety and follow them anyway for bugger all, which was great for skanky budget travellers like ourselves. Our kind of tightfisted leeches are known as "pipoca" which is portuguese for "popcorn" - quite an apt term really seeing as I found myself stuck in various peoples cleavages from time to time.

(someone else's expensive view)

Of course wearing a crap Elvis suit pinned me as "not from these parts", but probably no more than the fact that I was a white European man in his 30s trying to samba amongst 3 million Brazilians, who have been dancing since they were a foetus.

(our cheap view...fatboy slim approaching)

Aside the amazing typical Brazilian carnaval bands and music, there were a couple of other massive electronica blocos - one featuring superstar DJ Tiesto from Holland, and Englands finest Fatboy Slim (joined by David Guetta). These both attracted enormous crowds following them as they whizzed along at a breathtaking 1km per hour. It was having lost all sensation of my body, and then regaining it after a particularly tightly squeezed crowd section that I realised I'd been pickpocketed. Fortunately in that unsafe pocket I only had a few dollars and my pocketbook of Paris Hilton's Meaning of Life...so nothing of value.

The other main feature of Carnaval is drinking. Back in Australia you can arrested for drinking in the street. In Salvador, I'm sure I saw someone getting arrested for not drinking in the street. The streets are packed with people walking around trying to sell you beer for a dollar, and who am I to appear rude enough to turn them away.

I have to ask you this though - is it wrong to buy beer from a 7 year old? Of course I did, but I'm really not sure he'd completed his "responsible alcohol servers" course - especially since I was upside down half way up a lampost with no shirt on, wearing a "spongebob squarepants" hat on my head while I ordered it. He certainly didn't ask for ID.

Needless to say, after Carnaval we needed rest...and a lot of it...so we spent around 12 hours on various buses heading down the coast to a tiny little surfy town called Itacare. A few days of lazing around in hammocks, chilling on beautiful beaches, surfing and listening to heaps of reggae bands did the trick. Well, at least until a street seller sold me some meat on a stick followed by cheese on a stick, which has now seen me into my 3rd day of my hourly tour of local public toilets of Arraial D'Ajuda (where we've been for the last few days). There's a lesson to be learnt there - too much reggae makes you ill.

Anyway, gotta pack for the 18 hour bus trip to Rio now. My girlfriend's going to hate "I spy" by the end of that one.

Thanks for all the email -keep it coming crapelvis@gmail.com

Also if you're on facebook, a friend of mine has set up a Crap Elvis Fan Club group here
Already at a pathetic 50 members, please feel free to join and contribute to its crappiness!

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